Coldoktoberbeerfest*

I really hate cold weather.

I had to get that out before I could continue trekking on through this most painful post. I feel like I've spent about equal amounts of times breaking down Liebe Deutschland and building it up. This time is one of those break downs. I am 100% certain that my entire perception of Germany is going to change in the coming months. Those cold, frigid, awful months that I've so conveniently been able to avoid the other two times I been here are going to sneak up on me and consume all the beautiful sunny hilltops and strip away the melodic sun's glisten against graceful bodies of flowing water.

Charlie knows how I feel...

It really hit me today and I realized there's no turning back, my tracks have already been made by, & covered in the metaphorical snow. The story starts like this: I met a really gay (literal sense people, I'm clearly in a poetic mood tonight) group of Germans over the past few weeks that play basketball regularly on basketball courts along the Rhein river. Not only is it a breath-taking view that really makes me appreciate the smaller things in life, the competition is also really freaking awesome. We played for a few hours today, but at the conclusion of our Spiel I realized just how cold I was. It was probably about 57 degrees but my body did not appreciate the "drastic" drop in temperature when it had been rested peacefully at 70 earlier in the day.

I'm from the South. I have to reiterate these things for some of my readers because there may be a huge disconnect about how 57 degrees could spawn a post about the impending frigidness of Germany. 57 degrees is cold for me. There is no other way to read this response, I am fairly uncomfortable in this weather and although I do occasionally enjoy a crisp breeze, I cannot confidently say I'm looking forward to the deluge of mid-50 degree weather that's about to wreck havoc on Cologne.

My peak comfort level when it comes to temperature is right around 60 degrees, anything below that and you can expect to start to here subtle complaints about how cold it is or how I need a jacket, or how I can't bear this much longer. It's just one of those things that I can't deal with and it's times like these I regret having lived in the South my whole life because there is nothing I could do about having such thin blood for the cold weather.

The best solution I've come up with so far is to start drinking heavily to keep myself warm, perhaps that 's what I'll do. Might have some debilitating side effects which keep me from, you know, functioning, but it's not like it'd be much different than me in popsicle form anyway.

That brings me to an interesting point, once that might give some real substance to this blog post. Did you know the reason Germans are so famous for beer/they live up the stereotype about beer so well is because they brewed beer in the winter months as a method not to lose carb crops (wheat) during the winter months. I wonder what parts of American culture (if we have a +1000 year long history such as the Germans) would be preserved.

Hopefully not obesity.

Another fun fact, beer brewing in Germany is something that was originally done by women. A pretty interesting revelation since now we see beer brewing (at least in America) as a primarily male dominated profession. Not to mention the plethora of demeaning ascribing of roles to our women. This look familiar to anyone?

How quickly we forget that women did all the work for this wonderful craft to become what it was to the point that men could so conveniently demean them. WOW! Talk about going on a tangent. To be fair to myself, the logical link is there, go ahead, scroll back up, read through everything again and tell me that I could not have logically gotten to the St. Pauli Girl, with her overemphasized chest, beer and Drindl. 

Which leads me to my last tidbit for the day. Oktoberfest is this weekend for me. I don't even know if I need to say anything else about that but I will. I have been dreaming about this day for at least seven years, you know, ever since I started really taking an interest in Germany (this probably correlates directly with the first time I watched Beerfest) 

I know, I know, this scene and the entirety of Beerfest is about the most ridiculous adaptation of German drinking culture you can find, but can't a guy dream? I can guarantee you that I will have tons of fun being American and drinking beer in München this weekend and that is honestly all that matters at this point. 1. München is perhaps my favorite German city and I haven't spent THAT much time there but every time I've been it's been amazing 2. I'm going with some great people, shout out to Gaurav, Lara, Robi, Jesse, Kaela, Caitlin, Dexter. 3. Beer 4. It's the last weekend before the last week of class, talk about memorable conclusions. 5. Beer

Did I miss anything?

Oh yeah...beer. 

Just expect a post raving about it once I get back, until then, do yourself a favor and watch Beerfest, then you'll know exactly where I'm coming from. 

For all of you who might not have scrolled up to check the logical, sequential, fluid flow of this blog post, I did you lazy people a favor. 

Hating the cold ----> Germany's cold weather ----> Alcohol as a solution to cold weather ----> The etymology of beer culture in Germany ----> Tangent on America  ----> Women as icons: brewers of beer ----> sexual objectifications for beer ----> Drindls ----> Oktoberfest ----> Beerfest ----> Beer 

Logical. Got it? Good. Goodnight! 

*This title is what english would look like if it used German rules of word construction.